Waxy asumption.
I am becoming addicted to Hopi ear candles. I had my ears done with them and now I don’t feel like my ears are properly clean without having them done at least once a fortnight. I’d wanted to try them ever since I saw the picture in the holistic therapy shop of an old woman lying peacefully on her side while an unidentified hand holds a lit a candle made of beeswax in her ear, like her head’s a big waxwork cake, or she’s just died and they’re having some sort of weird party.
I also didn’t understand how they work either, and in my speculation before I got the courage to use one I made up my own theory about how they worked. What they actually do is create a kind of vacuum chimney in your ear because the candles are hollow so it gently sucks the wax out of your ear, but not knowing this I came up with the idea that their must be some kind of really long wick on the bottom that is pushed into your ear like an enema and all the wax drips down and mixes with the wax your ear, then cools down and you pull the whole thing out like one big plaster of Paris mould of your ear drum which you could keep and put in a jar.