Commitment and Bristol (unrelated).
I’m moving in with my girlfriend. It’s horrendous and wonderful all at the same time. I have agreed to share the same space 24/7 for the foreseeable future with a person who has a direct influence over my emotional and behavioral wellbeing. Am i Fu****g mad, or as I suspect possibly in **v* and becoming…I can’t even type the word….comfortable. It terrifies me.
I’ve been doing lots of ‘hard thinking’ recently, which is usually reserved for dire times such as the death of a relative or serious personal injury, where my brain goes into ’survival’ mode and strips away all the many fold creature comforts and niceties right down to the bare bones of what I need to get by. It wasn’t pretty, and kind of came down to a series of pros and cons. Pro’s included happiness, sharing, no longer being lonely, sex and knowing someone with a video camera. Cons included no more privacy, increased responsibility both financially and personally, and the slim possibility that it might not work out. But I don’t want that, and I have a tendancy to over examine things a little too much at the wrong end.
I love taking risks, and this is a massive wonderful risk, and I can’t live in a shared house forever.
It’s Saturday, I’m in a smoothy cafe in Bristol, it’s raining. Life is good.