HeadSpill

Damn you 2 Entertain! Thanks to your Revisitations box set I now own both “Caves of Androzani” and “The Talons Of Weng Chiang” twice.  MORE….

I love instant mashed potato, but when I buy a little pot snack of dried mash I always end up putting too much water in because the fill level indicator is on the outside of the pot, making the delicious snack all watery and unpalatable. Pot noodle have had the design solution for years where the fill level is part of the design, where the tub goes wider at the top, so it’s obvious on both the inside and the outside where the fill level is, but no one else is doing that.

It’s quite an obvious thing so I can only assume that the pot noodle company have patented the design of the fill level indicator, and in doing so made it more dangerous for everyone as the only way to see the fill level indicator is to hold the pot up to the light, which increases the difficulty of pouring the boiling water in and possibly burning yourself. As pot noodle don’t make instant mashed potato, I think any copyright they have on the fill level indicator should be removed for potato based products so I can enjoy my mashed potato safely.

Get nervous meeting people you admire? John Cooper met Bryan Talbot years ago, very briefly.

I’ve been in Bryan Talbot’s house. More specifically I’ve been politely chased out of his house by the man himself – back in 1998.

Day 33 & 34 - Dublin
On the train to Dublin along the coast. Pounds turn into euros, and my phone signal disappears altogether. As well as that I can’t seem to use my cash card (then realise they aren’t all link machines, doh). Last time I was in Dublin it rained all the time, but today the sun is out. I try to remember how life worked before mobile phones, and use a pay phone to call Mike Landers, Manchester comedy forum patron currently living in Dublin in a converted hotel apartment overlooking Tallaght. His gaff is the nuts, proper nice. With Mike as guide we all go for a pint in Kehoe’s.
The last gig of the tour is the next night at the Sugar Room, my finance’s mum and friend turn up to come and watch and it’s nice to have a familiar face in the crowd for the last gig. It’s an interesting room, like a dinner theatre, and full. I have a solid one and Charlie rips it…and we’re done.  I had envisiged a massive drinking session after the last gig, but it was all very measured, and considering the amount per night over the course of the month, probably just as well. Big hugs all round, and we go our separate ways.

Home
Flew into Manchester Airport. Got a train to Burnage. Walked through Fog Lane Park onto Wilmslow road. Got a bus to Fallowfield. Bought a pie and some bread in Sainsburys. Got a taxi home to Whalley. It made sense at the time.

Went to bed. Goodnight.

Day 30 - Derry/Londonderry
At Manchester airport I am frisked twice at security, maybe because I’m wearing Danny’s large brown duffel coat to keep the baggage costs down. I’m not sure what to expect arriving in Belfast, but arrive at the Malone Hotel without incident.
One of my best mates is Irish and I lived with him for 3 years, so I should know the appropriate naming convention for the city in which we are playing tonight. I think Derry, but Charlie is calling it Londonderry and on the way there all the signs say Londonderry so I start doubting my knowledge and think I’m getting it confused with a brand of butter. So I start calling it Londonderry, then as we’re almost there the road signs are all de-faced saying just ‘derry’. Oh Dear, I sense an ill-formed faux pax on the horizon. The gig is well attended and the venue is lovely. I avoid hassle by simply asking who is “local” and “not local”, I’d later find out that even the BBC have protocol for Derry. In the first instance it’s ‘Londonderry’, in the second it’s ‘Derry’ and after that it’s refered to as ‘the city’.

Day 31 & 32 - Belfast
For the few days in Belfast we are staying in an apartment thanks to Charlie - so we can do amazing things like use an oven or microwave. Charlie cooks an awesome steak, Kristina makes mashed potatoes, and I buy loads of ex-rental dvd’s for 99p to watch, which is almost helpful. I meet up with Phil Topping who I’ve not seen in years and he takes me on a great tour of Belfast city taking in the town hall, the Crown Inn (where we meet some american tourists on a cruise) and the catherdral quarter. There is a church with a big metal spike instead of a tower. This is becuse some of Belfast is built on marshland, so anything really heavy sinks into the ground. Phil tells me Belfast is a new city in the last few years, and it certainly feels like a place on the up. Busy, pleasant and the venue we’re in at the Waterfront Theatre is a big glass building with loads of venue spaces. We’re in the studio which we’ve almost managed to fill on both nights playing there. Friday’s gig is great, Saturdays is even better. Afterward, Phil and his mate take us on the drink around town, we hit a bar with a band playing, it is very loud and the drink is addlestones. I don’t remember much after that, a top few days.

Day 25 - Aberystwyth
The final day of the Welsh trilogy takes us to Aberystwyth university, and possibly one of the most gorgeous views on the tour as we decended the steep incline of the A44 and the road - cut into a vally lined with trees opened up, to reveal the rooftops of the whole town in the distance, beyond which was the sea.  At the time of day we entered the sun was low in the sky and reflected across the ocean throwing the rooftops into silhouette which was quite simply breathtaking. Then I crashed the car. No I didn’t.
The University was pretty amazing too. Cream bright walls and Big glass windows looking out onto the sea made it feel like starfleet academy, full of new student in the 2nd week.  The gig didn’t disappoint either, great numbers and they all lapped it up - especially one lad who claimed to have ‘everything’ on his ipod.  A great way to end the Welsh dates, certainly after Brecon. Did I mention I was repeatedly interupted by a kid with downs? I gave him the benefit of the doubt as he shouted out random words - while his friend/carer found more humour in his outbursts than my set. Bless Brecon. Finally got around to doing the interview with Charlie for SFX.

Day 26 - Guildford
Guildford isn’t London, but I think of it as London. From the you-can’t-park-anywhere attitude to the big haired posh woman who after 10 mins of driving round in the chock-a-block car park, stared at me, looked at the car and felt need to comment “That’s an interesting piece of parking!”. I looked at the car. It wasn’t straight, but it was perfectly acceptable. Obviously she didn’t know that I’ve spent the entire month driving and parking and driving and parking and driving and driving and parking and moving and driving and parking and parking. So I didn’t mean to be too aggresive when I dug down deep into my thickest mackem sensibilities and spat out “AYE PET, IT’LL DEE!”.
I got a ticket and decided to re-align the car, not because of anything she said, but out of pure dick-ishness. The second I got into the BMW and reversed a little, two cars appeared. “Oh good, Are you leaving?” quipped a fop from the window of his Audi. “No, I’m not.”.
The gig went ok, quite quiet.

Day 27 - Lincoln
The Theatre Royal in Lincoln was a lovely old place, and the crew were very pleasant. I was knackered so did a lot of sleeping in the dressing room. Over the tour my sleeping pattern has become very irregular. (I’ve just written that as ’speeling pattern’, which sounds a more accurate description.) Lots more sleep of the dreamy imaginary kind, where I think I’ve done something, or been somewhere when I haven’t and vise versa. My phone internet has stopped working, which is interesting as I forked out for the ‘unlimited’ package. Turns out Virgin mobile’s idea of ‘unlimited’ is 1GB, which sounds like a lot but isn’t. One of the features of the phone as sold was the BBCiplayer application, so after two episodes of Merlin and one of Spooks it’s all gone. Boo Hoo - I hate you virgin mobile. Oh no, I’ve fallen asleep with it turned on.

Another quiet gig, but I kick a good bit of energy into them.
A far too brief stop off at home beckons, then off to Ireland.