HeadSpill

With Edinburgh well and truly over, there a lull in the air. Only now getting on top of the utterly boring things that waited my return such as bills and washing. Also there’s a lull in gigs. It’s friday night and I feel I should be working so I dont quite know where to put myself, but Danny Pensive’s been busy and earning so I’ve taken my agents fee.

The Eczema Charity Ball has been postponed too unfortunately which is a bummer as I was looking forward to that, but out of the blue today I got a phone call asking me to compere a ‘pubcon’ next month, and suddenly I’m very excited again.

In light of no working weekend I took my lass to the pictures today to see ‘Tropic Thunder’. I must have looked at the cinema showtimes several times, but still managed to get all the way into the cinema in town and up to the desk before being told it doesn’t start until next week. Idiot.

It’s my last show today. I’m a little sad and I’ll miss it, but it’s been long and tiring so I’m kind of glad it’s coming to an end, so I can go home to my proper bed.
Saw Jim Bowen lost in the underbelly yesterday asking one of the assistants ‘How do I get out of here!’, though he could have been refering to the actual festival. My old mate James came up for a few days and we went to the Stand late show which was pretty awesome, ended up drinking with Stu from the stand improv and Paul Pirie unitl about three. Ouch. Went for a curry last night with Lou, Geordie Cook and Jimmy but it was all weird ‘tapas style’ curry where you ordered a few different ones, what with my nut allergy it read like a game of russian roulette on a bouncy castle filled with acid. The waiter had no idea what I was talking about, nothing had nuts in, then only two dishes didn’t, then it didn’t matter as they could make it without, then checked again what the actual ingredient was I was going on about. I didn’t order. Maybe I’ve just been spoilt by Manchester curries.

Even though today is my last show, I’ve still got the eczema society ball next month, and I’ve had some interest from the Leicester comedt fest too, so it’s not all over. Not just yet.

The end of the fest is in sight, but there’s still the last weekend to go. I feel like I should have been through the wringer a few time, but quite frankly I haven’t. Saying that the plasma screen in the venue has knackered, so I now need to do the full deployment of screen and projector, which was a bit stressful but I had that planned to start with, so  It’s just been a  slow and steady upswing of shows, and despite the technology tonight’s was the best one I’ve had yet, topping last Saturdays. The thing reigning me in is the pending review, not knowing when they’re coming has corralled any idea’s of late night’s I’ve got. Plus I want to check out a few show’s I ain’t had time to yet.

Went to See Seymour’s (Mace) show yesterday and ended up being the devil in the bit he does at the end, going to try and catch Catherine’s and Lou’s (Conran) Sketch shows tomorrow too. Made £98.46 in donations today, and more humbling praise. Loving it.

The weekend has merged into tuesday. So much going on it’s hard to keep track. Friday was rammed, and a great show, Saturday was also full (about 50- room capacity of 60) and the crowd with less festy and a bit more clubby, people who come up for the weekend and just wanted to see what they could. It didn’t distract from the show any. Sunday was quiet and relaxed, and Monday was my best show yet. Wor lass has gone home, giving me the romantic goodbye of kicking me out of her car at some traffic lights, which isprobably good for keeping my ego in check, and Barry (Dodds) is up for a few days. Went out for a few pints and I think I upset Damo (Larkin). Lou Conran, Geordie Cook and Zoe have arrived and put make up on my face.

It’s tiring and busy, but even now I know I’ll miss it when it’s all over. I’ve got a reviewers in this week, but as it’s non ticketed, I’ll not know when, which is probably a good thing.

Fridays nights show was another belter. Full room and I’ve ironed out a couple of creases that only became evident over the course of days. A friend came to see it who I haven’t seen in years, we went to infant school together and were neighbours, and she reminded me of stuff like how the headmistress was nicknamed Mrs bombdropper on account of her size, and how I used to have goats milk at milk-time and some of the kids thought if I had cow’s milk I’d die! Not true! It was really good to meet Caroline again (and Ian, nice the hear a familiar accent ), she’s a festival regular, if you’re reading this I hope you enjoyed the show.

Got to bed at 4am on Thursday morning, urg. Loads of places open late, but not everywhere. The royal mile after midnight has been almost dead, the exact opposite of the heaving noise and colour kaleidoscope it is during the day. Walking down the cobbled steets you can almost feel the stones unwinding, a spent atmoshpere as the whole street relaxes with a heavy sigh, getting it’s rest until the next days explosion of paper weilding bodies.

The show has settled into a steady rythum, but still just everyday can be better than the last. Went with wor lass to the ‘piemaker’ shop this morning and spent £13.40 on pies. Thats a lot of pies.

Monday. The chaps from comedysportz came down to see me, which was nice. Another full room too.
Did Pear shaped and saw a truly wonderful new act called Robert White. He openly reveals on stage he has aspergers, and is a very nervous presence. I sat and watched him with Paul Sinha, (who’s up for his 5 day run at the plesance) and he has some crackling one liners, and and lots of  filth. Unfortunetly at the end of his set he was heckled by a brash scottish woman at the back who accused him off crossing the line, and instead of going out with banging song about more filth, it knackered his flow, stupid cow.

Mc’ed the midnight ‘Electric Cabaret’ again and the fuse blew halfway through the gig. Only half the acts turned up, so I did some extra stuff at the end, I reckon I got a handful or so punters who are going to check me show out from it.

The better show’s I’m having the more I’m incapable I am of doing basic tasks, after saturdays show I took our lass our for food and couldn’t make a make a qualified decision about what a table for two looked, and nearly sat a a table for six.

Lee has left the flat to go back to manc, and already all gone pantstastic. We’ve nearly run out of bog roll and I’ve forgotten how to make tea.  Gay Dave is layed up after nearly breaking his ankle on Jas’ birthday.

It’s my day off today and my shoes are falling apart, can’t go on stage looking like a tramp. Off to buy some new ones. What do shoes look like again?

Heady times, Saturdays show was full, and it really was a belter, best one yet. My dad came to see it, which was pretty important to me, as did my girlfriend Bron. Bron’s upset that she’s not in it, and it honestly didn’t occur to me in the edit the way it turned out, but the truth is she spurred me on to do the show and runs through it like letters in a stick of rock.

You can tell it’s a good one when the hour just flys by and the cheer at the end drowned out the last few lines, but it didn’t seem to matter. Yesterday I made a fiver on the door, today I was into three figures of donation, the crowd really do vote with their pocket, (even if on other days they’ve been somewhat tight). I never made eye contact with my dad for fear of getting a bit emotional, there’s bits in the show that are pretty close, and I’m sure he remembers that they were utterly unfunny at the time. I may be doing the free fringe, but doing this show, a show in a sea of shows that are sexy and trendy and all topics populist. My little hour about growing up with eczema, being a geek and smiling through it is really one of the most rewarding things I’ve done in my whole comedy career.

Casualty
Saw my first comics death on saturday night too, I was closing the gig and the first act did 20 minutes of what went past stage death, into therapy, and out the other end where he was sweating so profusely I thought osmosis would take place.

Phonebooth
Edinburgh had another one of it’s instant downpours and I ran to take refuge in a phone box, just as I got their another chap had the same idea and we both squashed together as strangers in the cover. Unfortunetly the door had been ripped off and I had to wedge it in front of the exposed door frame giving the whole incident a survivalist overtone of man against the elements. We talked about the festival awkwardly and halfway through clunky conversation, and with him being quite taller than me, I noticed I small bogey sticking out of his left nostril which I couldn’t take my eyes off. He noticed my staring which made it more awkward. Eventually the rain ease and we went on our way with a firm handshake. I can’t remember his name, I lost the flyer, but I’ll never forget where I was for 3 minutes on Sun 10th August.

It’s saturday and I’m a bit stressed. On Thursday I was a Santa, for Jason Cook’s show, along with Lee Fenwick. The last time I dressed as Santa for Jas was with Lee at the Soup Xmas show in Newcastle back in 2004, ah the memories. Thursdays show rocked, last nights show was a bit quiet and it didn’t help that I was knackered. Been taking on lots of extra gigs, I’ve done I an outdoor stage, a show called ‘comedy for kids’, and a mc’ed a midnight show all on the same day, which, after a previous night on the man-pop, left me drained before I even went on for my own show. It was fine, but I felt like I was under performing. The lesson there is ‘pace yourself’ which I’ve heard said often, but now understand as the level of opportunity presents itself and neccessity to be focused and consider which gigs are worth doing is important.

Wor lass turned up early and surprized me, I figured she might to something like that, it was just a case of when and how. but after the quiet gig, she put a nice smile on my face.

Day 5. Did a couple of extra pick up gigs before my show, one of which on an outdoor stage was cancelled due to the rain. My 7.15pm show goes on after PBH (Peter Buckley Hill) who runs the free finge and is doing a brilliantly shambolic show of how, at bus pass eligable age he has used said pass to get from London to Edinburgh, just using buses. PBH is a bit of a legend on the fringe, but today was his day off and taking his spot was the lovely Josie Long, which was top.

Went for drinks with Jas, Lee, The Peter Vincent, Karen, and Wendy Wason. The rain pissed it down, as it had all day and the bar we shored up in had a big rainbow flag outside and the full of only men. Longley joined us and I wanted to do picture stuff with nipples, but Jas pointed out it was a bad idea.

Had a review from Three Weeks, not for my show though, just a spot I did at Pear Shaped in the Afternoon (edited for effect): “Gems came from John Cooper, who read hilarious passages from his diary, … just go and see John Cooper “. Not bad.